I have not been a fan of the events during the month of December for quite sometime. (Well, except for the drinking.) But we don't need to get into the reasons for that.
Here are my Holiday Rants for 2007.
1.If It Can Be Seen, It Must Be Adorned!
It occurred on my drive into work this morning. The contemptible decoration.
You may remember my denunciation two years ago about the extremely offensive wreaths on cars.
Well, this is what I witnessesd this morning and I am beside myself with disgust.
(Although I applaud the capitalist genius that is now making money hand over fist all across the land.)
Seriously, people. I ask again, why must every surface be decorated in some manner? It is not festive, it is not cheery, it is NOT cute, it is purely annoying.
It invites mockery and destruction of property. Why do you want that? WHY?
(You can read more here.)
There will be no end to this, I realize and I will eventually have to find an island in which to reside if I no longer wish to be irritated by these redneck-diguised-as-yuppie forms of 'holiday cheer'.
2. It's a Wonderful Life
I am not a fan of this movie. Yes, I've seen it.
No, I don't want to see it again just to be sure.
I didn't like it and I'm tired of people telling me that I'm un-American or cold-hearted or lacking a soul because I don't cherish this dismal movie.
3. Fake Patience
At the airport, at the checkout, on the freeway. This is the time when we want to be moving faster, not slower. Don't try to be all "Happy Holidays" when you've taken seven hours to put that bag sticker on my luggage. It won't get to where I'm going anyway. Just slap it on there and let me wade through the security checkpoint and all the other travelers trying to be excited about the holidays by faking patience as they tell their boring stories of what they do at christmas back home in Iowa.
That's all I can muster this year. The energy is low. Enjoy the rest of December and remember 2008 is Leap Year! Now that's exciting!
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